No You May Not Have A Bite

I had an extended conversation with my sister today about one of the greatest annoyances of parenthood: having to share your food. Is it not enough that we cook their food, cool their food, cut their food into a million pieces, get their fork, their napkin, their milk and appropriate dipping sauce?  When we finally sit down to dig into our own meal now we have to SHARE with our children too?!?!  This is some BS!

Sometimes I act like I don't hear those dreaded words, "Mommy, can I have a bite too?"  Here is what I want to say:

"No, damnit!  You just ate your dinner. This is MINE and I'm not sharing!  Get away from me you little leach!"

But that is not what I say. I tell them sure and I share. As my sister said, you want them to expand their food horizons so you share your food. You curse them in your head and pray that they don't like it so they won't ask for any more. 

Unless it is treat time. I absolutely will not share my treat. No way, no how. I hide in my laundry room and eat my treat in peace. I sit on the floor and lean up against the door while my boys bang, scream and try to kick it down and I devour my chocolate covered frozen banana and no you may not have a bite.