Snot Bubbles

I talk about poop and butts a lot. To be honest, my life involves a lot of poop and butts. But today I am not going to talk about poop or butts at all. Today I am going to talk about something entirely different. Snot and boogers. 

You would be shocked at the number of surfaces that I have to clean snot from each day. The couch, the rugs, the walls, the kitchen table...I even had to clean it from the Velcro clasp on Charlie's shoe. I cannot fathom why a prickly piece of Velcro would look like an appealing place to wipe your nose. 

They will walk around forever with snot dribbling down their noses but do not, I repeat do not attempt to actually wipe it with a Kleenex. This is apparently considered assault and they will fight you like they are being mugged if you attempt to clean it. 

There is a constant crust around my childrens noses no matter how often I wipe it, they pick them, eat them (vomit) and even let them run down their noses and suck them back up. It is all terribly disgusting but the most baffling boogerism of all is the repetitive bubble. You know what I mean. They are breathing through their noses, going about business as usual except for that snot bubble that will not pop. It disappears when they breathe in and reappears when they breathe out and they don't seem to notice. HOW can you not notice a glob of mucous sticking an inch out of your nose?!?!  It's Iike a train wreck: hard to watch but I can't stop looking!  Our family record is four minutes held by Charlie. I guess I shouldn't be surprised as these are the same children who taste random items off the floor in order to identify them. 

The grossness continues. 

Brace yourselves...this one pic is nasty