3 vs 6

Sometimes I write little secret notes to my boys in my journal.  I never give the notes to them.  This exercise is to help me clear my mind and organize my thoughts.  These latest notes are an excellent example of the differences between a 6-year-old and 3-year-old boy.

A note to my boys:

Connor,

May you always keep your charm.  Be confident in yourself and try not to care so much about what everyone else thinks of you.  Be your amazing self.  Accept that there are rules in life.  It does not matter where you are, there are things we all just HAVE to do and sometimes those things just stink.  Suck it up and do what you have to do.  Enjoy your life.  Be more positive and dont always be looking for the ugly side of things.  See that there are small pieces of happiness all around if you will be open to seeing them.  Eat something other than peanut butter.  Food is amazing and delicious and you are SO missing out.  Learn when you can let your true feelings show and when you need to keep it together.  Get outside and run around.  It is good for you health and also for you mind.  Dont ever stop giving me hugs and kisses.  I love you.

Charlie,

Please keep your hands to yourself.  People will like you more if you do not sit on their heads.  You do not need to completely remove your shoes, socks, pants and underwear to go poop.  I love you.

Expensive Red Lipstick Days

I have a secret. A very strange secret. Not even my husband knows. Its dark and deep, and...sometimes bright depending on the day. Huh?! Expensive Red Lipstick. When I am having a crap day or feeling extraordinarily anxious or uncomfortable I wear bold, red lipstick.

Child 2 kicked me in the face while I attempted to put on his shoes...popped on some Dior in Rouge Massai. Got my second speeding ticket in a week...slathered on YSL Glossy Stain in #9 Rouge Laque. Got back from dropping off the kids for school and realized there are two days of dirty dishes to wash and six loads of laundry to fold...pull out the trusty Chanel Rouge Coco in Gabrielle.

It is a weird thing to do...I realize this. But something about a luxurious red lipstick just seems to make everything else easier. When I wear red lipstick I am not quite as tense, I carry less anger, I smile more. It just makes the day a little easier to face. I mean come on!  It's MUCH harder to scowl at yourself in the mirror when you are rocking a perfect red lip.

I always take it off before my husband gets home from work because...you know...he doesn't need any more proof that I'm a lunatic. I provide plenty of that without involving my cosmetics. ;)

So if you happen to run into me in Costco wearing my big grey sweatpants, with my dirty hair in a wad on top of my head but notice I am wearing red lipstick without another stitch of makeup on my face, instead of backing away slowly from the crazy lady, come give me a hug...I probably need it.