This evening Charlie decided that losing my entire one piece swimsuit at the end of a ride at Wet N Wild in 1995 was no longer worthy of being in my list of top five most embarrassing moments.
It started off innocently enough. What does a mother do when her nerves are worn thin and her husband has a work dinner? She takes her children to run free in the little piece of hell known as McDonalds.
It was going pretty well as far as McDonalds experiences go. There was the nasty food, the weird smell and a birthday party happening at the table next to us but nothing too unbearable. I was writing my to do list for the rest of the week when I heard Connor yell, "Mom Charlie took his pants off!!" And it wasn't just the pants. It was the diaper too. I busted into a full on sprint to my little flasher.
I can't be certain but I'm fairly sure that the entire six-year-old birthday party went silent and stared at Charlie's bare little butt. I tried to shield him while Connor spent what felt like days looking for the missing britches but, as I've shared before, he is an exhibitionist and loves for people to see him naked. So my attempted coverup turned into me slinging a shrieking, half naked two-year-old boy over my shoulder while I turned bright red.
After I redressed and scolded him I tried to walk back to the table with my head held high. But there is just no coming back from that. I could feel those judgmental party parents' eyes burning holes in my back and I began to wonder if a child could be arrested for exposing himself. F it! We are leaving!
And that is why today definitely warranted two blog posts.
Does this face not scream rude tude!?!? It's a good thing he is so cute!
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