Silent Night

It has been a trying week for me. You know when you feel like you are failing at everything?  When you feel like a terrible wife, mother, friend?  Like a terrible person in general?  Yep.  That has been me this week. 

My children can frustrate me to the point where I feel like I want to curl up in a little ball on the floor and teleport to a quiet, peaceful place. I get so mad and upset that they are acting awful and I envision shipping them off to a faraway land where someone else can deal with their attitudes and messes and fits. I feel like I am out of ideas of how to teach them how to be decent humans. I can't take it anymore. 

And then they go and do this. 

The boys wanted to sing Christmas songs on the way home from school today. We sang the usual: jingle bells, Rudolph and Santa Claus is coming to town. I asked them if they knew silent night and started singing in the best voice I could muster. When I finished Charlie cheered and clapped and, after a few seconds of silence, Connor said, "You sang that so pretty."

Feeling proud of my operatic attempt I said, "Thanks sweetie. Do you want me to sing it again?"

"No mom. It made me want to cry."

Ouch. Way to deflate my balloon kid. 

"On no, it should make you happy, Connor."

"It did mommy. You know sometimes something is so sweet and nice that you just want to cry?"

Yes you sweet, nice, precious child. I know EXACTLY what you mean.